Tuesday morning we were picked up nice and early to be driven across the island to catch a speed boat over to Nusa Lembongan, departing from the beautiful, yellow sand beach side resort town of Sanur. Really well organised. The boat ride is about 30mins across a pretty serious bit of ocean. And we are in Asia – Indonesia even, so boats are a bit of a touchy subject. Less than five minutes from shore the Japanese tourists were looking to hurl.. it was a crack up..all of a sudden their selfies weren’t so exciting….
We get to the beautiful Mushroom Bay in Nusa Lembongan and we were met by staff from our hotel/lodgings of choice…the Tarci Bungalows in Jengatbatu beach. No transport on the island other than golf carts, scooters, push bikes and the occasional very recent addition of like a bongo van with a tray table back with bench seats.
After winding around these tiny laneways, mostly dirt, we ended up in an absolute waterfront oasis in a “Deluxe” apartment Number one. So of course, I am now known as Mr Number One. Upstairs, uninterrupted views of the ocean, above the pool, bar and restaurant, verandah the worlds biggest bed….it’s as big as a football field. Including breakfast this it a total rip off at $65/night.
Without doubt, the BEST beach front accommodation we’ve ever stayed at. Phi Phi Bungalows a close second but this has it covered.
The staff are like your best mates. I think they are all family, and the oldest staff member would be maybe 30?
Options abound….sleep in the bed made for twenty, nap on the day lounge on our own verandah, swim in the pool just ten steps below, swim on the ocean just 30 steps away, drink under the shade of the trees, in a sun lounger, on a bean bag, in the open air bar, eat freshly cooked lumpia (spring rolls) or rice paper rolls, or……, or walk along the beach and choose all of the above from thirty different options, surf, kayak……I’m tired thinking of the options.
For the rest of day one we did a combo of the above…sat on the verandah drinking ice cold beers and cocktails, with the occasional trek to jump in the ocean, then the pool then back to the verandah. With food. And beers.
All of a sudden the entire staff knew us as Mr and Mrs Number 1. And they treated us like royalty.
We felt guilty that night heading up the beach to eat somewhere else, but the appeal of a Mexican cantina on the beach in bean bags, owned by a truly ruly Mexican was too good to pass up. It was about 50metres up from our place and called Blue Corner Bar. Bean bags, big umbrellas, tables in the sand, or Indoors at a very casual Mexican restaurant. We chose bean bag option and a carafe of Sangria. Who’d have thought that on a reasonably isolated Indonesian island, we’d be drinking awesome Sangria?
The views back to Bali are awesome and being there for sunset was brilliant – watching the shadows fall over Mount Agung, the often active volcano on Bali, then the lights start up along the coast from Nusa Dua in South Bali, up to Keramas on the Mid East coast is just beautiful. No beach hawkers hassling you, no pushing and shoving, just relaxing – eating and drinking.
Sunset is always between 6.15pm and 6.45pm all year round, as it is so close to the equator. Full dark is probably 7.30pm so candle lamps go on up and down the beach, and the soothing sounds of some Balo playing beautiful guitar but singing horribly fill the night air. Another $36 for dinner and drinks well spent. How can they get away with charging these exorbitant prices?
We headed back to our place and the bar/restaurant was in full swing – and Mr and Mrs Number 1 were greeted like the returning heroes from battle – so we thought it rude to just go to our room…..just a couple of beers and Baileys?
Which lead to another pretty funny episode – too many to tell. But when I ordered a beer – “Large one for Mr Number 1” – and the Baileys, old mate Nyoman asked me how many “somethings” I wanted….I had no clue what he was on about. So he and I had a laugh about me being deaf and him not understanding English.
Anyway, he was asking me how many “rock” I wanted with the Baileys….WTF is he on about? Then I realised he was asking me very politely how many ice cubes I wanted….he said “one”? I said “what? One ice cube? How about five?” He said “no no no not fibe – how bou 2?” Anyway, I couldn’t believe on an island where there is no bartering as there is no need to, here I was bartering about how many ice cubes we got in Karen’s Baileys. For the record, we settled on 3. But that took me the length of time to drink my beer. So when I went back to Karen at our table, she asked where I’d been and I just said she didn’t want to know…..drink now delivered and sure enough, 3 ice cubes…
Anyway, next shout…Old mates brother Made comes to the table and says Mr and Mrs. Number 1 same dring again? We said yes please and don’t forget 3 rok. He must have told his brother at the bar, and being the total smart arses that they are (and I love it) Karen’s Baileys was delivered with about half a kilo of ice in the glass….gold.
Next morning we were up early for a quick dip, then breakfast and we grabbed a motor scooter for the outrageous price of $7 for 24 hours. Another one of the staff organised this for us, then gave us a map of the two islands – Lembongan and Ceningan – gave us a key to a bike and away we went. Helmet? What’s that? “Sunglasses and hat is all you need”.
We headed north on this little island through the mangrove areas that dot the north coast, through tiny villages untouched by western spoils, who were actually in the middle of one of their annual celebration days – 7 days after Nyepi – and they were all walking from village to village in their ceremonial dress carrying food and offerings to share. Beautiful.
We wound through the jungle on some pretty horrid roads/tracks that challenged both me and the scooter, but we popped out the other end on the eastern side of the island to see amazing views over neighbouring Ceningan Island – even more remote that Lembongan.
You may recall about 3 or 4 months ago, a cable, rope and timber bridge called the “Yellow bridge” collapsed killing a number of poor locals over here…well this was where that happened.
The “Yellow Bridge” was the only means of getting from one island to the other, and the locals had been over on Ceningan for a religious celebration, upon their return the bridge just collapsed into the water below. So for three months they were isolated – boats the only way of getting across the verge.
So, we rode over it and it was an experience. Once on Ceningan, we followed the road around the coast and found some of the most magnificent beaches, bays, inlets anywhere in the world. I had no idea it was like this. It’s insane. We found a surfing point called “Secret Point” and I understand why because we found it purely by fluke and hand written signs on the road. The most perfect waves ever – 6-8 feet, pure power and like glass and 7 or 8 blokes out just ripping it up. There is a bar/cafe right on the point exactly where the surfers take off in the line up, and it is just like being in the water with them. A unique experience, especially for non surfers.
To get into the water, the surfers stand on a rock ledge in this bar, throw their boards in the water and jump in after them. Fabulous.
Around the corner is a cliff jumping place which scared the absolute crap out of me, then there is a beach called “Blue Lagoon” that has the most mystical coloured water ever.
“Dream Beach” is as it’s name suggests, but it is so dangerous they tell you to enter at your own risk. Looking down from above, you could see the deathly rips and currents pulling and tugging…no swimming for me.
We wound down into Mushroom beach, which is probably the most touristic spot in the island but it is beautiful. Had a leisurely swim, had lunch (vegetable samosas and a hamburger of all things!) in a great cafe with beers and cocktails called Hai Tide Bar and Grilland watched a bunch of Japanese tourists attempting to paddle board … backwards…..Great entertainment.
Dinner in our hotel outdoors on the beach with a lovely night view once again, cocktails, beers and one of the best feeds of the trip. Freshly caught calamari lightly battered then we both had beef rendang….mine just a little spicier than Karen’s but goodness me…..total cost of today’s adventure including motor bike hire, lunch, beers, dinner, cocktails, desert, baileys with 3 rok…..approx $80
Early start the next morning and Karen had a bit of a rumbly tummy…we had negotiated with the guys at the hotel to take us out swimming/diving with manta rays.
Unfortunately but quite correctly, Karen pulled the pin, but I went out with a lovely young couple from England and a couple from China who had spent the previous three days taking photos of her on the beach at all times of day and night in different outfits. Seriously, four and five outfit changes a day! To be honest she was no Elle McPherson either.
So, when we realised they were on the boat with us, Karen nearly changed her mind because the cost of the trip would have been worth just watching them.
They didn’t disappoint. We were dead set 300m from shore in this very fast speedboat and old mate Charlie was over the side squealing and trying to hurl. It was going to be a long three hours for him, because Old Mate boat driver wasn’t taking him back. She changed twice on the speedboat, seriously when just sitting and holding on without being thrown overboard was a challenge.
Well, the two poms and I did anyway. The sea was quite rough, and as we were against a cliff face the current quite strong.
I was in the water ten seconds. I kid you not. When coming straight at me about five metres away was this humongous black creature with his mouth wide open taking in all the plankton he could….lucky Karen didn’t come with us because if she were with me right now, her rumbly tummy would have lost the fight.
I just about lost it myself and ducked underneath this massive thing that just ever so graciously glided over my head and went on it’s merry way. I followed him for a while until another one came up from the depths. Tip to tip they would be approx 4metres. Giants.. We were in the water for probably 45 minutes in total and saw 6 or 7 of them. Or, one or two of them a few times each haha. Massive massive trip and life highlight. I’m just dirty that I don’t have an underwater camera…
We left Manta Point and did other beautiful dives at three other places called Crystal Bay, The Wall and Mangroves which i didn’t even know was on the agenda. Fantastic morning. Three hours of fun.
We eventually managed to get The Model and her hubby in the water for a quick paddle and as we were throwing him over the side he said “I canna swiiiiiiiimmmmm!” The only English he spoke in three hours. Oops.
Firstly, why would you go on a dive boat for three hours if you can’t swim.
Secondly, there were life jackets everywhere for him to use which he didn’t.
And thirdly, pommy bloke and I looked at each other to decide which one of us was going to jump in and grab him. I lost. So Indo boat driver and I jumped in and got him alongside the boat coughing and spluttering going “Eeeerrrrgggghhhhh. Eeerrrgggghhh” while Pommy mate did the manly chivalrous thing and offered to take the Model for a swim around the boat, holding her hand and showing her some fish and stuff. Spare me. Pommy missus thought it was all hysterical and worth the cost of the trip.
So as usual, he’s the hero and I’m the goose. Standard.
Back then the hotel, pulling up on the beach out front. Adventure charged morning cost – $20.
Rest of the day was spent around, in the pool, in the ocean, drinking, chatting, recounting the events of the morning with the poms, talking crap with the Indo staff, but also getting to know about their families and lives etc. Great day. Didn’t see the Model or her hubby for the rest of the day.
Wandered down the beach for dinner and sunset cocktails at a popular cafe/bar called The Deck with sensational decor, views of the harbour where the boats come in and out, and the sunset. Just beautiful. For our last night here, this was just perfect.
As much as I couldn’t believe it, we had nachos with our drinks and it was unreal. Karen had a few different cocktails and some nice wine (very rare to get good wine in Bali and if you can get it, it’s expensive) while I had a few beers and realised I just couldn’t fit another beer into me. Impossible. I couldn’t believe it. So, I switched to Cider. And all was well.
We couldn’t be bothered walking back along the beach to our hotel, and there are no cabs here…..so I asked the barman if he could arrange a lift for us. NO problem! Down the back lanes in the back of a pick up truck straight to the back of our hotel. Perfect and how they rock over here.
Now, four days on Lembongan with accommodation, all meals, lots of drinks, snacks, motor bike hire, Manta ray diving etc etc etc total price for both of us was AUD$375.00. We tried to figure it out last night, because you just don’t pay for anything in the hotel until you leave. And you don’t sign for anything, it is dead set an honesty system. I thought it would be about $440 for the hotel stuff alone. Obviously I’m a bad accountant. Add on the two dinners we ate outside on the beach and The Deck and our total spending over here was $455.00. It’s hard to believe. We will be back 100%.
We spent this morning lazing, breakfasting, swimming and preparing for our boat transfer back to Bali. We booked a short stay hotel near the airport for 7 hours for $40. Perfect to freshen up, relax and get ready for the boring flight home. Did a bit of last minute shopping and finished this diatribe….war and peace.
So comes to the end another action packed, funny, enjoyable trip. And for the first time apart from a rumbly tummy or two we got through without being crook for the first time. Yay. Makes it so much more enjoyable.
Again, thanks for taking this ride with us. It’s been a hoot and I hope you get as much fun out of reading this as we did writing it…
Ralph and Karen's Tours 